...to think about a my 'resolutions' for this new year

...and I wanted to make them realistic.

One of the things I am pretty good about doing at the end of every year is making a photo calendar for our families every year.

And Friday night I sat down trying to make up these calendars.  Well...

Pity.  Party. Time.

The photos made me feel so sad...about all of the all of the stress and loss and change.

Have I mentioned before that change really isn't my thing?

I went to bed two hours later, without the calendars complete, and a giant headache from crying about all that I missed or happened.  My #4 being a baby.  My friends.  My kids' friends.  My house.  My job.  My husband.  My family.  My surgery.

Thank goodness I don't have many days like that.

But it made me realize that really, I am not sorry that 2011 is gone.  It really wasn't all that banner of a year.
Sure, I am probably a stronger person for it in all of the areas of my life: my faith, my marriage, being a mother, a sister, a daughter, and a friend.  But I am not sorry that year is over.

So, I haven't completed the calendars.  But I was very reflective.  And it made me think about my New Year's Resolutions.

Resolutions are hard to keep.  And, I think that the New Year is a good time to hit the re-set button.  To try to do things a little better, a little more, a little less...

So in no particular order (although I did number them) here are a few resolutions for myself:

1)  I am going to try not to make excuses for myself or my children.

• Meaning sometimes, I might not be very good at keeping in touch.  It doesn't mean I don't want to know how my friends/family are or what they are up to.  Actually, I wish I could stay in closer contact.  But my children can be all consuming.  However, if you don't mind talking while my cherubs are chasing each other through the living room with light sabers and I am running water in the kitchen than please feel free to call.  If I can find my phone, and it is charged I will do my best to answer!
• Similarly, if friends stop by, I am going to not make excuses as to the state of disaster that my home is probably in.  Again, I just reference my four cherubs.
• My children.  I adore them.  I love their sweetness and their sourness.  And sometimes they are not well-behaved.  They are children.  No, they are probably not tired.  Nor are they probably hungry.  Probably, they are just grumpy.  Or rude.  I will certainly try to correct them.  But I am going to do my best to not make excuses for them.

2)  I am going to try to make better, healthy choices.

• less fast food
• more organic foods
• less processed foods
• more water
• better recycling habits
• more consistent exercising
• floss every day (yeah right)
• take my makeup off every evening (there is never enough time/energy left in a day)

They're all lumped in here together.  But I am always trying to do these things.  Maybe if I write it down I will have a little accountability.

3)  I am going to try to not volunteer for things.

I love to help others.  I love to make people feel welcome.  I love to be a part of my kids school.  But I have a lot of my plate right now.   I need to try not to take on anymore.  Meghan where are you???  I need my gate-keeper!

4)  I am going to try to read more.

I love to read.  And since both of my children have Kindles now, surely I can sneak one of them for my morning runs!  The technology of changing the font size has done wonders for helping me to read while I am on my treadmill.  And surely, this will help with my #2 resolution.

There are so many other things that I would like to do better (grocery shop), do more of (projects with the kids), do less of (drink coffee with real half/half) but I think for now, these four resolutions are good start.

So, if you are a family member waiting on a calendar, please refer to #1.  Technically this project is 'grandfathered' in for resolution #2.  So, I'll get to them.  I will.  (They just may have a start day of 1 March or 1 April.)

Give me a little time to work on them because for right now I'm going to be busy with resolutions #2 and #4.